i may step on toes here but i don’t think it’s anything wrong with spouses putting their expectations out there as far as weight and appearance. of course those things can change, but if being in shape, and having an attractive spouse is important, why not make that known and commit to it. being in shape is healthier, and you look better, and i don’t know any married people that don’t care how their spouse looks. alot of times i think husbands aren’t totally happy with their wife’s appearance but they just don’t say anything cause they don’t want to hurt their feelings. and some wives may be the same with their husband. i want my mate to keep me on point and if he sees me getting out of shape, by all means tell me.

Its fair only if both parties agree to that concept before hand. And, with such preferences, it is imperative to understand the type of individual character that a significant other possesses before marraige becomes an option. Furthermore, when we take a realistic view of that person and ask ourselves “Is he/she right for me” – we must be honest with the understanding that ultimately we can only control/change ourselves.
This is a little tricky because it really depends on the circumstances surrounding the situation. Ultimately, any spouse should be supportive and understanding of each other’s issues – in a perfect world, right? Honesty is best but harrassment and throwing verbal daggers is not. Sometimes, people can get confused on what is really the issue when other issues arise. For instance, is it the weight gain is the real issue for both indivduals in the relationship? Or, is it the fact that maybe the weight gain of one partner draws attention to another issue thats not so obvious in the other…
Be well…